Tuesday, May 8, 2012

This Sucks 2.0

Good morning!  So I haven't ran since my 10 miles on Saturday and that is just so frustrating.  Yesterday was my birthday which I wasn't all that excited about to begin with and then the day just got progressively worse.  Its a long story but a very close family member, you could call her my 2nd Mother, is in the hospital with a life threatening condition.  She is very sick and the doctors aren't giving me a ton of reasons to be optimistic.  My actual Mother isn't here and neither are any other adult family members and therefore that leaves me...which is overwhelming to say the least.  I am not use to being the adult, I am not use to being the one who stays calm and asks the questions and gets things taken care of and has to use my big girl voice.  I am the one who sits in the chair in the corner and listens and then asks for clarification from the actual adult in the room, which this time is me.  So you could say yesterday was a true birthday for me, I officially entered adulthood and had to find my big girl pants and right now I just do not like the way they fit.  But this is the card I was dealt right now and I am going to do everything in my power to get her better...I don't know how or if its even possible but I'll figure it out one way or another.  So running has been on the back burner, I need to get out there because I know it'll clear my head and make this real life stuff feel more manageable.

I have so many plans and ideas for this blog and I want so badly to get them out here and stay focused but there are much bigger things to handle right now and that is my current focus.  I don't have any new information about her health right now, but I'll be calling shortly to get some idea on how to proceed with today.  Day by day is how this thing is going to go and everyday with her will be a gift.  So I am so sorry if I am missing in action AGAIN but at some point this will become my focus again.  Running has become just a main thing in my life, I feel like running gives me the strength and confidence I've been searching for and I will be back at again.

Please send up some prayers, or good wishes or whatever you feel might help.  I would appreciate any of it!

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